You're Not a Doll, Mama. You're a Chingona.
Oye, mamas (hey, mamas), let's talk about a word I can't stand in recovery culture: "doll."
Surgery doll. BBL doll. Every group chat calls you one. And I get it, it's cute and it builds sisterhood. But I've always secretly hated it. You're not an inanimate, hollow object made of plastic. You're a living, breathing woman who just went through real healing.
"You're not a doll, mama. You're a turkey!"
In my early years, whenever a client panicked on my table over her swelling, I'd joke with her: "You're not a doll, mama. You're a turkey!"
It comes from one of my all-time favorite movie moments, The First Wives Club. Bette Midler looks at Goldie Hawn, who's spiraling over her endless cosmetic upkeep, and asks if she's a Thanksgiving turkey: stitched, nipped, pulled, and tucked.
It never failed. My clients would laugh, exhale, and soften. ¡Qué alivio! (what a relief!)
The deeper truth: you're a chingona
Years later, writing Snatched and Swollen, I realized there's an even deeper truth. You're not a turkey either.
You are a chingona.
In Mexican culture, a chingona is a woman who's resilient, capable, unapologetic, and fierce. She doesn't wait for permission. She doesn't shrink when things get hard. She owns her life, her choices, and her body.
What being a chingona looks like in recovery
It doesn't mean you never cry. It means you heal with active agency instead of passive victimhood. It means:
You treat your body like a partner, not an enemy to beat into shape
You refuse to let shame or secrecy decide how you care for yourself
You learn how healing works so nobody can bully, gaslight, or scam you
You protect your peace and keep drama away from your bedside
You give your tissue time, because real remodeling takes months, not days
You made an investment in yourself. Now you protect it with discipline, education, self-respect, and a whole lot of grace. Add a strong ¡sí se puede! (yes, you can!) and a calm nada le pasa (it's going to be fine).
Here's your chisme for today: the next time someone in the group chat calls you a doll, tell her you're a chingona. Watch how fast the energy changes.
Read the whole chapter
The chingona mindset is the very first chapter of Snatched and Swollen, and it sets the tone for the whole book: how to heal with confidence, culture, and calm instead of panic.
If you're in Sacramento and want a chingona-approved recovery team, I'd love to help.
I'm a Certified Massage Therapist (CAMTC No. 39170), not a doctor. This post is for education, not medical advice. Always follow your surgeon's instructions. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.
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